Ola!

Life is surrounded by so many questions. Although we cannot seek to answer all of them, we can look at some of the ones that challenge us in life. Destiny, fate and hope, are they all fallacies created by the mind to continue our journey in a life distraught with problems large and small? Although it may be impossible to seek the whole truth we can take a journey on understanding some of the mysteries of how life and reality collide with these beliefs that keep us whole.

The journey of life is filled with mixed emotions, and I am certain this blog with evolve to reflect many of the crazy range of emotions I manage to feel! Hopefully the level of offensiveness in my writing won’t get out of hand. Hang in there; life’s mysteries as interpreted by moi will continue to unravel!

Lately I have been through some enormous life changes. I made some big decisions to change many of the things that have made me very unhappy for a very long time. Trouble is when you internalize your suffering and hide it from people, they do not accept your evolutionary changes. People do not like change whether it’s in their routine or in their environment. I am a mere environmental affliction for most. I have made some big decisions which I have revised in my head infinitely, I cannot say that I regret them. The people I was surrounded with worked out in two parts, some that choose to shun me, make lucid inquires of my decisions and others that decided to pretend nothing happened, ignore the situation completely. Which leaves me with me, myself and I. This should be an ideal situation but being the people please-er that I am, I torture myself daily with question and answer sessions in my head: Why did it work out the way it did? Am I to blame? Why after all the sacrifices that I made did I choose this route? Could I have done things differently?

I learned that I started depending heavily on the people around me to answer these questions for instant relief from my inner questionings and then I found I would fall into the same pattern endlessly, daily. I would start off positive and end the day in absolute negativity.

So I embarked on a quest (Google is the quest!) to answer some of the questions of life that tormented me enough to make big changes. The purpose of life, Why am I here, Who am I? In my research I found some very amazing people! One such person is Jiddu Krishnamurti. I am in the process of reading his book, “The Limits of Thought”. He talks about Truth and Reality,  how although we may view them to be one in the same, they are not! I am posting his speech on the question so many of us ask: Who Am I?

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